Pandemic lessons: How I learned to not take humanity for granted
During all these months who would have thought that I will have this power of muting the sound of the crowded boulevards, the bustle from the coffee shops at 9 AM, the sound of the first-morning metro, the clattering of dishes while we all have lunch at work, the joyful chatter of kids leaving school. It feels like time’s moving more slowly. Like when you are in an accident and everything feels so palpable and you realize in an instant everything is over. But if it’s not over, then what is it?
It feels like time’s moving more slowly. Like when you are in an accident and everything feels so palpable and you realize in an instant everything is over.
TOUCH ME NOT
We are all missing something very essential during this pandemic and that is touch. We were in these 8 months deprived of touch, unfortunately, we made touch the ultimate taboo, and we created a sort of phobia towards it, which is completely normal and understandable, in order to protect ourselves from the virus.
I find myself calculating how many people can legally be in the same room, I find kissing in movies a bit too much and touching hands outrageous.
There is this fear installing in my brain every time I see a new ad, every time I see a movie, read a book, a fear that detaches me from the usual gestures of care. I find myself calculating how many people can legally be in the same room, I find kissing in movies a bit too much and touching hands outrageous. I am reluctant about everything that involves touch and whenever I see a crowd I ask myself “where are their masks?”
BUT HOW IMPORTANT IS TOUCHING? HAVE WE UNDERESTIMATED IT IN ALL THIS TIME?
It struck me to see that our daily communication has been built around touch, it’s basically the first language of communication, from the moment we were born.
We have so many words in English which are metaphors for our need to touch. “Let’s stay in touch”, “let’s keep in touch”, “we are touched by your words”, “sending you hugs”. We bond with our hands, like handshakes, taps on the shoulder, hugs, oh my god, hugs, I completely forgot how they feel; all of them were until now actually an essential sophisticated language. They had the role of giving us constant reassurance, peacefulness, confidence, love, forgiveness and so many other vital needs.
It struck me to see that our daily communication has been built around touch, it’s basically the first language of communication, from the moment we were born.
I was reading an article on Aeon about these tactile gestures that are not only to build connections between people but also to establish power relationships, mostly in Western society. One study, they say, showed how a firm handshake was a key indicator of success in a job interview, and that’s probably because the handshake is the very first way that we close the physical gap between us and the other. [… ]It is believed that the handshake arose as a way of ensuring that the two people involved weren’t holding weapons. A handshake stands as a proxy for competence and confidence. Yes, it makes so much sense, if I think now about the people I have met and shaken hands.
I definitely don’t trust people who don’t hold my hand firmly or those who are just touching my hand briefly, and maybe that’s because I don’t get the reassurance that, Yes, from now on, I signed a contract with you, where we are going to collaborate with each other. So, yeah, maybe we are not in the same boat, and that’s the first sign I should not ignore from now on. Haha.
The idea of touching activates certain areas of our brain to the extent it is influencing our thought processes, reactions, and psychological responses.
Touch is crucial and it was a tool of survival for humankind. Even the hairy part of our arms are designed to be stroked, isn’t that amazing? We are hardwired to like to be caressed at 2.5cm/ sec. It is comforting, and that’s because we release endorphins.
The idea of touching activates certain areas of our brain to the extent it is influencing our thought processes, reactions, and psychological responses. We communicate mostly with our hands. And the truth is they are honest, we cannot hide from what they say. Sometimes we have wrinkles on them, scars, cuts, spots, burns, compulsive movements, symbols, or special handwriting. There is also an interesting ad that I bumped into recently describing this.
We rest our chin on our hands when we listen, we touch our chin with our hands when we think, we touch our ears with our hands when we contemplate or try to remember something, it’s all incredibly connected. And surprisingly when I look at my hands, they become the most certain thing that I have, they are in front of my eyes - the most concrete thing of who I am.
Touch is crucial and it was a tool of survival for humankind. Even the hairy part of our arms are designed to be stroked, isn’t that amazing?
THE COMPENSATION PHASE
As I am working in advertising, I pay attention to lots of ads and videos, mostly during these times, when I am genuinely interested to see how people all over the globe, make sense of this reality, of these tiny gestures we are all missing tremendously. There is one ad that stayed with me in all these months, and it’s a collaboration with Kate Tempest and Facebook, you can watch it below.
It's coming to pass/ My country’s coming apart/ The whole thing's becoming/ Such a bumbling farce/ Was that a pivotal historical moment/We just went stumbling past?/ Here we are/ Dancing in the rumbling dark/ So come a little closer/ Give me something to grasp/ Give me your beautiful, crumbling heart, recites Kate. It gets me every time.
The lack of touch brings out an overflow of emotional gestures and instinctively we dream about it and during these months we tried to execute in videos and ads this incapacity of sharing these gestures, for instance, this ad from Activo Bank shows, in a very simple way, what are the first things we are going to do after the pandemic ends. Smelling the coffee from a coffee shop, tiny waves touching our feet, the sound of beer bubbles on a torrid summer day, and so on.
We try to grasp with emojis that show hugs, care and empathy, hands instead of faces which are trying to substitute our emotions. We want to escape to a different time and place, where things are easy, peaceful, exactly like this window swap, which takes you somewhere far away, to somebody’s house window. We have lots of love to give and different ways of expressing these intense emotions, for instance, Barcelona Opera decided to connect in a much deeper way with nature and plants, so they dedicated a whole concert to 2,292 plants since they cannot have a different audience. Perhaps we are afraid we don’t know how to do it when things get back to normal.
In conclusion, after this pandemic ends, we must reconnect with all our people, hug them, caress, handshake all the new clients until exhaustion, haha, and be thankful that we have each other. We cannot afford the luxury of losing ourselves and losing this language we cannot live without, that is touch.
Photo (1): Raisa Hagiu
Manuela Dospina
Brand Strategist | Heraldist & Wondermarks Cluj